Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Waking up is hard to do

Sometimes when I wake up in the morning I am so tired and so confused I have to run through a step by step process to keep my head from exploding. It typically goes like this:

Okay stand up.
There's an alarm going off.

Okay, someone stopped it.

Where am I?

Okay, there's a photo of me.
This must be my room.
Who's that in the bed?
Oh, okay, that's my wife.
I know her, it's cool.

Do I have to work today?

Is that why the alarm went off?
Is it a weekend and my wife forgot to turn the alarm off before bed?
I'll worry about that later.

First I need to get to the backyard and figure out what planet this is.

This will usually continue until I either get in front of the computer or wander into the neighbor's yard and they call the police. I'd say it's similar to being drunk, but since I never have been I can't be sure. How bad it is typically depends on how late I went to bed and if I ate a meatball sub right before falling asleep.

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